prose

If I don’t do something now, I won’t

Four hours, perhaps less now. Time seems to stop still, squeezing, pulsating against her head; inside and out. The throbbing never quells the screaming inside. She needs to escape, break out of these walls. How such a feat could be accomplished, she did not know. What do you do when your whole being seems to be just that, being?

She often wondered if other people experienced this struggle; if they were happy with simply going to work, going home, sleeping. Did they have a purpose? Had they unlocked some kind of door, a gateway to realisation? Or had they accepted their demise, happy to surrender to the daily monotony of existence?

An empty void threatened to overpower, begging for something to fill the nothingness within. Something had to change before it ate her from the inside out, leaving nothing but a hollow shell. Eyes darting, restless legs, a stomach quivering; she had dreamt about this, being forced to join the lost souls walking the earth aimlessly, without intuition, ambition… a life. She had to escape, before the darkness consumed her one last time.

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